I'm Still Here...

So, here's where I am in this:

• I still can't bring myself to go to church. It bothers me way too much, for so many reasons.
• I am learning everyday that we really don't know very much at all.
• Believing requires conceding that you don't know.
• I don't like ignorant defensiveness. I don't think you can vehemently defend something you've never challenged.

So, in all my challenging and not knowing, I absolutely broke down last night. This is very frustrating and I am angered by the temptations to simply "go with what you know." That's not good enough for me. It's blind and lazy. I won't be either.

I know that Christians are wrong about so much. I know that each Christian is an individual and that I can't lump them all in one box. And I know that I'm going to spend some time talking to other people who believe very differently. I want to get an idea for how other people have come to what they hold as belief, as faith.

Other than that...I'm still here...in this journey.